MORTY (O.S.)
I'll never understand why some people think mesothelioma is just another cancer. They clearly lack our vision.

INT. BOARD ROOM – DAY

A dozen people are seated at a long table with one empty chair. They are impeccably groomed, and wearing the best clothes money can buy.

Standing at the head of the table is a man named COUNT VOLDEMORT SIDIOUS HITLER THE TERRIBLE, known to his coworkers as MORTY. He is 60 years old, and looks like Dracula. His gray/white hair is slicked back, and he is wearing fake vampire teeth, though it is unclear whether they are his real ones. His black cape is unmistakably vampirian.

MORTY
Ladies, and gentlemen, make no mistake: we are on the verge of a new order. Mesothelioma is the past, present, and future of our firm, the town, and as we will soon see, the world. We are the soldiers in the fight against injustice. We are the mesothelioma lawyers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.

FRANK tries to enter the room quietly, and edges his way over to his seat. Nobody makes eye contact with him as he does.

MORTY
A chain is only as strong as its weakest link. In order to capitalize on the opportunities before us, all our links must be strong. Don't you agree, Mr. Breadstick?

FRANK
Yes, sir. Sorry I'm late, sir. I got in a kung fu fight with my girlfriend last night, and then asked her to marry me, and then...

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